7 Ways to Have Calm During Covid-19

As the founder of the Charleston Hypnosis Center & the American Hypnosis & Coaching Academy, I can say that one of my specialties is helping people manage or overcome stress.  Moreover, in the past decade, the number of clients seeking solutions beyond traditional counseling and medications for deep seated anxiety, depression, and trauma related problems has increasingly grown.

I have been personally challenged to put my professional strategies to the test as I have navigated through loss of a best friend to brain cancer, divorce, children going off to college, and now the Covid-19 pandemic.

For myself, I created a mental arsenal of techniques I could practice, one or more steps I would take every single day for staying on top of my stress.  Because I knew that if I didn’t, it would take its toll on my health, my relationships, my attitude and my success.

Before I Offer My Suggestions…Notice How I Won’t Say Practice Meditation? –

WHY? I am laughing as I write this because one very famous personal development author recommended this to people to start doing during the Covid Crisis.  My first reaction was a big hearty laugh!   Personally, as difficult as the practice is for most people, I was thinking that if you haven’t been practicing quieting your mind regularly, you could be setting yourself up for failure if you try to meditate NOW.  I recently took some Krav Maga self-defense classes.  One of the philosophies is to practice self-defense moves repeatedly so when the real danger comes, your self-defense measures are automatic and second nature. 

If you can meditate already, ABSOLUTELY BE MEDITATING!  If you can’t, practice positive visualization and appreciation instead (See #6 & #7 below). It has the same basic physiological benefits as silent meditation like calming respiration, heart rate and increasing circulation.

Here are 7 Ways to Have Calm Under Stress of Covid-19

1)      Shift from a State of Fear to a Healthy Sense of Caution – This means take action.  Self-distance.  Prepare.  Do whatever you can do to stay safe and keep others safe.  Then, say to yourself, “I did the best that I can do to stay safe and healthy.  Now, I have to let it go of worrying about the aspects I can’t control.  Worrying and staying in fear over the aspects of this pandemic that you cannot control are just creating more stress hormones in your body which can impact sleep, digestion, focus, mood and healthy immunity. 

2)     Speak Gratitude for Your Health – This retrains your mind to focus on the good in your life instead of focusing on your worst fears. Say out loud affirmations like the following, “I am thankful for my health.  I am thankful for my body.  I am thankful for healthy immunity.  I am thankful for being healthy right now.”  Now is the perfect time to focus on appreciation of ALL that you have going that is good in your life including your health.

3)     Acknowledge What You Love About Your Home – Too often we take the basics for granted like our health and our home until something like Covid-19 happens. When we acknowledge what we love, we are focusing on the positive. Do you love your sofa or your bed? Your pillow?!  When you are sitting or lying in them, say out loud, “I love this sofa!  I love my bed!” Do you have flowers growing this spring?  Say, “I love these azaleas, they’re so pretty!” or “These roses are so beautiful!” This goes beyond gratitude.  The mind is programmed to focus on what we concentrate on and what we concentrate on grows in our awareness. 

4)     Embrace Your Emotions – There are no BAD emotions.   It takes a lot of energy and work to suppress stressful emotions.  Cry if you feel like crying.  It’s okay to be angry, just don’t hit anyone or break anything (that’s what I used to tell my kids).  If you feel anxious, remember the symptoms of anxiety are always preceded by an anxious story.  Ask yourself, “How’s that story working for me?”  Then, tell a different one.

5)     Minimize Exposure to the News and Social Media – lf you find yourself more anxious and stressed after listening to the news or reading, go on a news and social media diet. Once or twice a day updates READING the news and scrolling on social media will greatly lower your stress. This is especially true for EMPATHS or Highly Sensitive People. 

6)     Spend Time Focusing on Desired Outcomes – It is very difficult to tell yourself during times like this NOT to worry.  Not to project unwanted scenarios.  The subconscious mind is wired to keep you prepared for the worst and in, simplistic terms, to avoid pain.  Use your downtime to imagine and journal about the highest and best outcome for yourself and your family members through all of this. 

7)     Make Finding the Silver Lining Your Superpower – In the Hypnosis and NLP world, this is called reframing.  Your brain keys off how you think of something NOT on what’s real.  For your own inner calm and for your children, make it a game, then a strength and then your SUPERPOWER to seek the positive in every situation.  Become relentless about telling a positive story about what is happening.

Finally, I am grateful for each of you that have taken the time to read this far.  Let’s all throw up our hands and say a collective gratitude prayer, “Thank Goodness for Toilet Paper!”

Don't Let Fear of Failure Hold You Back!

CEO of Spanx, Sara Blakely, Shares Her Thoughts on Failure.

So many of my coaching clients discuss their fear of failure. Some are immobilized to take desired action from fear. Others from perfectionism. When I watched Sara’s video for the first time, I was inspired that she grew up with such a positive mindset around failure. Mindset drives our behaviors, our reponses, everything! Watch and get inspired!

Empowering Your Mind to Create a Breakthrough

One of the most popular complaints I hear from potential clients is that they feel stuck.  It's that situation where you cognitively KNOW how you want to be thinking and behaving but it's just not happening.  There's a big disconnect.

Maybe it's getting up an hour earlier to work on your book or exercise.

Maybe it's that diet you've wanted to start or the bad habit you know you need to end.

Maybe it's the unhealthy relationship you've been in and you know it's what you want but you can't quit the person either.

These undesirable patterns can painfully go on for months, even years.  Overtime, they zap your energy, your motivation, your productivity and most of all your confidence.

And it's not for lack of trying....I can’t tell you how many times someone comes to me complaining their stuck and they have spent hours, months, even years…. reading, researching, seeking advice from experts only to keep spinning their wheels without a breakthrough.  

That’s because logic often falls short when it comes to solving a problem. 

For those of you who have worked with me for a while, you may know that my sessions are very different than anything else you’ve tried.  Why?  Because, I have a unique and rapid system to break the "stuck" patterns which I call a Whole Brained Problem Solving. 

And it’s not just something I use.  It’s something I teach. 

You know that old idea of giving someone the fishing pole not just the fish? 

Here’s how it works…

First, I use a coaching technique to hone in within minutes and readily identify the limiting beliefs and thought patterns that are holding you back.  That’s the left brain part.

Second, I pull out the big guns:) 

I use an arsenal of right brain, creative problem solving techniques including hypnosis, introspective imagery, NLP, and even regression work to go even deeper and find the hidden roadblocks that are holding you back.  The ones that you might never discover otherwise because they are not logical.  They wouldn’t seem to be related at a conscious level.

Frequently, this is the missing piece for people.  (Or I could say “missing peace.”)

The result …..

(COACHING + HYPNOSIS)

(LEFT BRAIN PROBLEM SOLVING + RIGHT BRAIN PROBLEM SOVLING)

= ACCELERATE BREAKTHROUGHS!

Often in one hour, you’ve made a breakthrough after struggling for years. 

Whole Brained Problem Solving occurs when you employ both left brain and right brain problem solving techniques in one session.   The two approaches combined created a synergistic effect which leverages your results over time when you receive custom recordings for reinforcement.

To sum up, Whole Brained Problem Solving is at once a powerful coaching method, an introspective, creative problem solving practice and a pathway towards rapid breakthroughs.

Whatever prompts you to explore this experience — from anxiety to overcoming a habit to personal & relationship development to spiritual growth —  Whole Brained Problem Solving as an ongoing practice can support rapid change as well as positive and lasting shifts. 

Moreover, Whole Brained Problem Solving gives you an edge in life and in business. 

So if you want to be more successful, you’ve got to start using Whole Brained Problem Solving and give yourself an inner advantage over your competition.

If you have any questions about how Whole Brained Problem Solving might enhance your life or give you an edge, please let me know.

And speaking of time… A shift in our experience of time is part of what happens through the Whole Brained Problem Solving. This is clearer in experience than from words, but I’ll try to offer a glimpse.

In each of the Whole Brain Problem Solving sessions, something quite fundamental shifts in how we experience the world, and who we experience ourselves to be. As part of this, our way of experiencing time itself shifts. And this is one of the reasons why the method tends to naturally dissolve our unhealthy emotional reactions, and other “stuck” patterns. (To have an emotional reaction, we have to code cause and effect in a certain way through time. When this crumbles our emotional reactivity dissolves.)

The more I practice Whole Brain Problem Solving, the more I experience an ability to be in the moment. Perhaps, that’s because it has allowed me to perceive a stronger sense of control over my experiences and a greater confidence in myself to handle whatever life throws at me. 

If you are feeling stuck with something or looking for an edge, contact me and let’s explore what this work could unlock and unleash for you!

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Empowering Yourself to Get Unstuck!

It's actually not that hard to create a life that's really flowing, full of love and energy.

At one point, my life used to be a real struggle. I had inherited that "farmer" mentality from my parents and grandparents who grew up on dairy farms in the South. I believed that if I wanted to achieve anything of real value, I had to work hard and struggle for it. I'd get upset when things weren't the way I thought they were supposed to be.  I'd get down on myself if I wasn't pushing, pushing, pushing to get ahead.

I know now that life doesn't have to feel this way. And it's actually pretty easy to turn things around. All it requires is willingness. The willingness to look at your thoughts and beliefs and a willingness to admit when they aren't supporting you in greater levels of peace and happiness.

When I developed a debilitating bout of chronic fatigue when my children were toddlers, I had to give up the struggle.  I had to stop beating myself up and feeling guilty for not being Super-Mom, do it all, successful biz owner.  I got humbled and I had to let people help me. 

I had to draw stronger boundaries with my time and my commitments.  I had to even take things off my plate that I enjoyed when my body told me to rest. 

What was most infuriating is that the doctor told me, “We don’t really know what causes chronic fatigue.  Frankly, there’s no cure for it.”  It's the most obvious, logical thing in the world when a doctor tells you, there's no cure your illness to believe it. I felt stuck.

The turning point in healing from my chronic fatigue came with two MINDSET breakthroughs.

First, this "good" girl got defiant! 

Which meant I refused to believe that I was stuck with the chronic fatigue - mystery illness!  I kept affirming to myself, "I am drawing to me, the people and circumstances that I need to get healthy and well again." 

Let’s be clear.  This is not a DOING, PUSHING, STRUGGLING action. In fact, it is the opposite.  It’s a MAGNETIC pull using the power of the creative mind to draw to me what I need by visualizing the intended outcome and allowing my subconscious mind to work on the solutions while my conscious mind is busy doing other things. 

Second, the solution to healing was not a body thing.  It was a mind, body, spirit thing!  So I changed my sleep patterns.  Then, I used hypnosis to clear the stressful emotions and wounded spirit that were connected to my dis-ease. 

These two mindset shifts were the lynchpin.  Draw to you your solution.  Address the problem on all levels of body and mind.

Next time, you notice yourself feeling overwhelmed.  Ask yourself, what am pushing for or against?  Must you struggle?  Or can you shift your mindset to support you in success with more grace and ease?

Try it.

1)  REFUSE TO BELIEVE YOU ARE STUCK!  Because the minute you do that, you will stop looking for solutions and your subconscious mind which is a wealth of information and resources far beyond the conscious mind will stop as well.  Just tell yourself, "I don't know the solution at the moment, but I will find it or I will meet someone who can help." Or use the affirmation I used above.  Your subconscious is far more resourceful than you can imagine, it works on solutions in the background while your conscious mind is busy doing other things.  That's why a name you've forgotten will pop in later or long after the test is over, you recall the information you thought you had forgotten.  If you come to rely on this ability to use your subconscious for problem solving, it will enhance and become a source of confidence and wisdom for you.

2)  OPEN YOUR MIND TO SEE ALL ASPECTS OF A PROBLEM.   Many times when you are stuck, it is because you are not addressing your problem from a whole brain perspective. Put bluntly, sometimes analysis and logic is not enough.  Oftentimes, there are hidden factors contributing to a problem whether they be emotional, unconscious, hidden mindsets or belief patterns.   If you have a health issue, consider if stressful emotions are playing into the illness or disease.  Also consider the possibility that the illness provides a payoff or gain for you on deeper hidden level. I worked with a client who had migraines for years.  Through hypnotherapy, she discovered that they served the purpose of giving her an excuse to stay home from work, a job that she had grown to hate.  Once she became conscious of this, she chose to quit her job!  No more migraines. 

Years ago, I quit engineering to make it my mission to help anyone who feels stuck.  If I can help you, I would be honored to do so.

Meanwhile, sending you much light and love.  The world needs your unique talents and light.  You are meant to #makeadifference

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